Shit I watched on the plane

Alternate title:  I've HAD it with these motherfuckin' movies on this motherfuckin' plane!!  Really, I couldn't pass up the obvious joke, now could I?

So as many (or all) of you know, I was on two incredibly long flights and one short one over the last couple weeks (I think I totaled about 50 in-air hours).  It was like a movie-watching goldmine!  Emirates had a zillion films I could choose from.  You will see from my entry today that sometimes I did not choose...wisely.

So here is my film itinerary, just a couple lines per movie so you get the gist. Cuz sometimes that's all you need.

USA to AUS

Jurassic World - released in 2015

I'm not gonna deny it...I love me some Chris Pratt.  This movie was a perfect plane movie....funny, charming leading man, great special FX that were visually big  and an easy storyline to keep track of (Dinosaur runs around. Everyone acts scared).

Thumbs up!

Ant Man - released in 2015

I'd say meh to this.  I love Paul Rudd but even his charm couldn't really do it for me in this film.  Also, what is Michael Douglas now, 1000 years old?  Whoa. My favorite part was Ant Man's friend, Luis.  He's this street-wise gangster type dude who is really funny.  His vocal cadence and demeanor, apparently, were taken from a "friend of a friend" of the actor Michael Pena.  Worth the free viewing.  Slept through a bit of it.

Thumbs middle.

Asterix:  The Land of the Gods - released in 2014

To be honest, I don't even know if this is the one I saw...I can't remember.  I'm assuming it is because via Google I discovered that it's the most recent Asterix offering.  I slept through almost the whole thing.  I saw enough to know that I am not a fan of the animation style.

Thumbs zzzz.

Pitch Perfect 2 - released in 2015

I liked this one!  It was funny and kept my attention on the plane.  As usual, I especially love Elizabeth Banks and John Michael Higgins as the emcees (and our eternal Greek chorus).  They play off each other brilliantly, in fact I think they provided me with some actual LOL moments.  Which is always awesome when you're sitting alone on a plane.

Thumbs up!

Jupiter Ascending - released in 2015

While I did not for ONE SECOND buy the love story aspect between Mila Kunis and Channing Tatum (and she's with Ashton so I'm willing to buy a lot), I was entertained by this movie.  Eddie Redmayne played an evil guy and honestly his talents were wasted on this film.  His acting "style" seemed to basically consist of "sound like you have laryngitis".  I know he can do better than that.  This movie was also incredibly long.  I think there were at least two plot points they could have lost and I wouldn't have minded.

Thumbs middle.

MELBOURNE to PERTH

Tomorrowland - released in 2015

This was on a quick flight in the middle of my trip.

I wanted to like this...I really did. I mean, it's directed by Brad Bird for crying out loud!  The Incredibles!   But, meh.  Clooney seemed to phone it in a bit.  The kids were good but the one little girl was doll-like (for good reason, which I won't spoil if you haven't seen it) so you can imagine how I felt. And Hugh Laurie was just a bit weird.  Additionally, this also could have benefitted with a good trim.

Thumbs middle.

AUS to USA

Hot Pursuit - released in 2015

Holy shit.  I can't even with this one.  Reese Witherspoon and Sofia Vergara, what the FUCK were you thinking??  Abysmal.

Thumbs all the way down.

Ex Machina - released in 2015

I've been wanting to watch this for a while.  Watching it on a plane was definitely not the best venue but I still liked it a lot.  It's a moody, atmospheric film with only 3 main characters. Everyone gave stellar performances.  It's a quiet film that I think will stay with me for a while.  I have to say, I've become a fan of the main actor, Domhnall Gleeson.  Check out About Time if you haven't already seen it.  It's a lovely film, too. (fun fact:  his dad is Brendan Gleeson (MadEye Moody) and they were both in Deathly Hallows together because he played Bill Wesley!)

Thumbs up!

I know this doesn't seem like a lot for my flight home but on the first leg I had a row to myself (sweet, sweet stretched out sleep) and I also watched a couple films that are going to get their own entry next month.

(My drink pairing suggestion for any of these films is a tiny bottle of your favorite hooch and A LOT of water.  It's important to keep hydrated on a plane.)

My takeaways:

#1 - I've discovered that on a flight there are films you need to sacrifice to Morpheus.  I call them Sleeper Films.  I did this with Toy Story on my way home (sorry Pixar).  You put it on and it blocks out the sounds of airplane and crying children.  Bliss.

#2 - I guess I never realized (or maybe it's because of the specific airline?) that swear words are bleeped out of movies on airplanes. Silly. You can barely hear it anyway so what's the point?

#3 - Another fun fact:  Keegan-Michael Key was in Pitch Perfect 2 AND Tomorrowland.  He was definitely a treat in both films!  Glad to see he's getting some big screen time!

xoxo...hashtagSueslife